sneak peek of Quinn's nursery

spice racks used as book shelves

framed mirror to be painted coral

brian is not a fan of this crib but i've always loved it! i love that it looks a little old fashioned and that it's not super bulky!

can't go wrong with a $20 rug!

(cause we all know the kid is going to make a mess of it eventually)

i've always been obsessed with this pillow!

(so i'm glad you're a girl Quinn so i can finally have it in my home because it doesn't go with our living room or bedroom)

lovely fabric for a fitted sheet and changing pad cover

(i've never been a fan of the bedding sets and the site i found to create your own is ridiculously expensive! so i'm making the sheet with this pretty fabric and still on the hunt for a softer yellow, preferably stripped, for the bed skirt)

these soft blue curtains but floor length

Q is for...

our sweet baby GIRL Quinn!!!!

...and this is how we told our families :)

(these are all 20 weeks)

performing well :)

scary looking skeleton fetus

her none scary side

our little Quinn is apparently quite the dancer! it took the sonographer a good amount of time and me moving from sided to back to side to get all the measurements that were needed. she just wanted to keep moving all around. we saw her little legs running on my bladder, playing peek-a-boo, and waving her tiny little hand at us!

my favorite part of the day is when brian says to me as he wants me to come over to him, "bring me my daughter." i about died! how cute is he to say that :)

oh man i'm still in shock! for a while now i've thought it was girl. at first i was like, i really think it might be a girl but then i just thought am i just thinking that because that's what i wanted. and i didn't want to be wrong about it so i kept an open mind. we already had our girl name picked out since our first pregnancy about a year ago but weren't too sure about our boy options. so the last few weeks i kept trying to find boy names that i felt like i could call my little boy but nothing really seem to fit. and now i know why :)

it's a....

boy or girl?? two more days and we will have an answer!! i can't believe i'm about half way through already! i feel like i've gotten so used to 'the baby in my belly' that it's so crazy to me that it really is a little baby boy or a little baby girl. and finding this out will make it so much more real that this little person is going to be a part of our family, in our little home... with it's own personality and needs. and i will be the mom of this little person! i will be the one responsible to teach and love our little person. i sure hope that i can do this! it's such a huge responsibility, but then i also remember it is the most important one you can have here on earth! what a blessing it is to be trusted with this sweet little child! i'm so glad our Heavenly Father knows us and what we need. i know this little person is coming to us to teach us so much, to show us more love than we can imagine. this adventure will not be the easiest but i know it will be the best and most rewarding thing we ever do!

19.5 weeks

18 weeks.

18 weeks today!!? what? where has the time gone! before we know it two weeks will have gone by and we will know what this little babe is! any guesses? i'm voting girl and brian is, of course, very sure it's a boy. so we'll see. i don't have any major intuitions about it being a girl i'm just hoping for it :)

we are feeling pretty good these days. as expected, i'm super tired but with cramps (almost like period cramps) and bad back aches if i do too much. so i've been trying to let myself rest more often. i've learned that a hard work out and then being on my feet the rest of the day usually is not a good idea. especially if i haven't eaten much! lately i don't really have an appetite but that is not a good thing when you HAVE to eat. i still have some sick days/times but i'm so glad it's lightened up the last couple of weeks. right now we are loving fresh cold cucumber slices, juicy melon, i guess anything fresh and cold containing lots of water sounds good, and mexican food. and of course those random cravings, like muddy buddies, which i make and then only eat a few bites of as the rest sits there days later getting stale.

18 weeks (i was on my way to the gym so not the best picture)

i always forget to stay in a cute outfit to get a belly picture because i live in pajamas once i get home.

our little adventure and a little baby bump

since our days off from work are opposite we don't have a lot of time do much together. so we took advantage of my wednesday off this week and stayed the night camping in big bear. i guess we are counting it as a our two year anniversary adventure too... since it's coming up on monday!

morning sun

making breakfast

driving to the trail

post hike baby bump [16 weeks]

....i had just drank a ton of water so it might be more my bump than baby's bump.

and i guess i should give a little pregnancy update:

sickness- up until about now i've had the worst nausea! only thrown up a total of i think four times but i wish it was more because at least there was a little relief afterwards. i was always to the point where i'd start walking to the toilet but then nothing would happen and i'd just keep feeling like i could puke at any second...all. night. long. in the beginning it was pretty much there all day but the worst once the evening hit. then eventually it got less in the day, which was great because i could make it through work, but then still horrible at night.

i always had to eat to keep it from getting worse so i just felt like i was always eating and never exercising because i was too sick. now it's still there in the evening/night but i don't feel like i'm dying.

food/cravings- it's hard to say i have certain cravings because i feel like had them before i was pregnant too. (doesn't everyone?) but i do notice a few things that are different. i looove really cold water! like lots of ice! it just tastes so good. i've always liked spicy/sour things but now i really want them. i think the sour candy helps settle my stomach a bit too. and luckily i don't get heartburn from them yet. only at night from drinking sooo much water. and water! i feel like i can never drink enough! i'll drink so much my belly hurts but still feel like i haven't had a single drop. and then of course i start having to pee every 10 minutes!

i was eating all the time because i was always hungry and needed to help the nausea but now i don't ever really feel like eating and i have a hard time deciding what sounds good. which is really annoying because i start feeling sick if i don't eat something.

one thing i hate is my total lack of motivation around the house. i usually love cleaning/organizing everything and i do a great job keeping up with all the chores on a regular basis. mostly because it feels so good to have a clean home and i don't mind making/keeping it that way. but now it doesn't even bother me anymore to let the dishes sit for four days when i used to do them right away, or let the bathroom go a few weeks instead of weekly. i think now that i'm not as sick it's getting better but man i have lots of things to catch up on! lets hope that nesting stage hits full force in the end so i make up for all the time i didn't care.

and of course there are all those symptoms of pregnancy that you forget actually happen until you are pregnant... constipation, extremely sore boobs, preggo brain (or forgetting everything), being able to smell eveeeerything! (i used to have to hold my breath when i would open the fridge or cabinets), breakouts, unable to get comfortable at night, being super grouchy, and there's probably lots more that i can't think of right now. at least some of these only last a little while but then there are lots more that will be coming my way...stretch marks, feel free to stay away.

too many ideas!!!

some of my favorite nurseries... i think i'm in trouble if i have a boy.

love the ikea spice racks on the wall that are used for books in this one!

definitely using that idea! ...but put a little higher so crawling baby doesn't eat the nice books.

also love the chevron rug!

love this teal color dresser...good thing this color is good for a boy too because it seems to be in every nursery design i'm drawn to!

love all these fabrics!

and this yellow crib which is sold in white is my very favorite!!

and seems to look so good in yellow in all three of these rooms!

i'm hungry and i have to pee...

...is the story of my life right now.

it might have taken us a couple of pregnancies to finally get a real one, but i'd say it's totally been worth it! i couldn't imagine not having the experience of miscarriages now because i've seen how much i've grown, how much we've grown as a husband and wife, and i wouldn't change it for anything! but most of all it has made me love this little bean sooo much more!

(even if i feel like poop most of the time)

i told my doctor as soon as we found out which was a day before four weeks.

(and in the target bathroom because i was too impatient!)

because of my history she put me on progesterone suppositories to keep my levels up and low-dose aspirin which basically is just a blood thinner. and then had me schedule a seven week ultrasound to verify the pregnancy. those three weeks from the time i peed on the stick to our first ultrasound felt like the longest three weeks of my life! i was so incredibly nervous and would go from being happy about the positive test to just wanting to cry and begging for the worst not to happen again. i just didn't know if i could go through it all over again...not just emotionally but physically.

in my head i really really thought it was going to happen again. i thought we would go in, have the staff say congratulations blah blah, then once the little ultrasound thing was shoved in me we'd find an empty sack, just another big black whole without a fetal pole, then sit in the lab forever, while i'm trying not to cry too hard, to wait for more blood tests to be taken.

i'd done it twice before so i knew what to expect and i thought it would be the same routine that day. but this time as soon as the little wand went in me the heartbeat was beating away and i could see our little one and it's soon to be placenta!!!

i couldn't believe it! i was in shock! i just cried.

here we are at seven weeks:

and lucky us!

i thought that first ultrasound was our real first one but really it was just to verify the pregnancy. so we got to see our babe looking a little more like a human again at 12 weeks!

this was the best! it's little arms and legs were moving all around! and you could actually see it's fingers and toes! (they don't really show on the pictures though)

so here we are at 12 weeks:

(i know they say 13 weeks on the picture but i think the nurse practitioner's measuring was a little off)

ahhh now all i can think about is how crazy it is i'm actually growing a tiny human inside me and that it's going to have to come out of me!!! i can do it, i can do it!

saturday adventure

we don't get too many of these due to brian working weekends but...

a couple saturdays ago brian crawls back in bed

real close to me around 5 in the morning.

i told him he was going to be late for work and he says

i'm not going i want to spend the whole day with you!

lets just say i was super excited :)

(what a nice husband)

we cuddled tight and slept some more,

enjoyed the hot day at mission trail,

and ended it with some slurpees.

look what we made that's growing so big!!

nope. not a baby. did i trick you?

i really wish i took a before picture

because you would know why i'm so happy about these beautiful plants of ours!

they used to be itty (is that how it's spelled??) bitty tiny things!!

but i can only take zero credit for their growth. brian has done it all...

planting, fertilizing,making sure they are getting what they need, and watering EVERY DAY! (without me reminding him about it)

i'm very surprised to say the least haha.

but oh so happy because i can't wait for some delicious tomatoes soon!

(great job babe!)

now off to make some bread. yum!

have a great, looong weekend :)

CAN'T WAIT FOR...

this!!!


here is a little something to watch if you aren't caught up...



her entire story is being featured on 20/20 tonight and i couldn't be more excited!!!! everything about her and her adorable, sweet family is so inspirational to me. she makes me want to be a better person, a better mom someday, a better mormon. sometimes when life is hard i remember what she has, is, and will be going through and i suck it up right away. because nothing compares to her story and how she has chosen to continue her life and share her testimony. what a women!!

yesterday was a poopy day. i had to work in the afternoon and straight from there was going to joanne's to get the last thing i needed for my project for sewing class that night.. and then to haley's house to head to our class. i got everything ready the night before and had it all lined up by the door so i wouldn't have to drive back home because it's further than haley's. my machine, all the gadgets needed, and my super cute fabric that i couldn't wait to get working on... and right as i go to pick up my things to get in the car for work i realize that i don't have the stinking cord or peddle to even use the machine!! i started frantically looking for it knowing that i knew it wasn't in the few spot that i looked because i had already organized everything since we moved. i hate being late so i was even more upset. i kept looking hoping that it wasn't actually in our garage which brian, who is at work, has the key to. so i left it all and went to work and now have to wait another two weeks for sewing class.

on top of being mad at myself for not realizing the cord wasn't with the machine until the last minute EVERYONE but me is having babies. it's not fair. it's not fair that i keep thinking that if i could only get and stay pregnant that i will be happy. but i HATE that i think that. i shouldn't think that. sometimes it's just hard to be happy. and sometimes i just don't want to do anything because i just want to sit and let myself be sad. i'm allowed to do that right?

it's annoying that certain days i have so much motivation to do everything... like eat healthy, exercise, cook and clean the house, be social, practice the piano for once!, actually finish the book i'm reading. and then other times, like yesterday, i only want to be home and do absolutely nothing but be sad.

easter

is it just me or are holidays no where near what they used to be like when you were a kid. everything about holidays was so fun and exciting and now they almost feel like any other day. one thing i am grateful for about being a grown up and holidays is that now i can really understand the meaning of them. Easter was great! church was just what i needed to hear and the afternoon was spent with my family. what a blessing it is to have the gospel of Jesus Christ in our lives and to be able to celebrate His resurrection. i can't wait to share such a wonderful thing with my children some day and teach them about the love of the Savior and the blessings He as in store for us! i hope you had a great easter as well and happy friday!!

babies/blurry iphone pictures

meet carmen. the youngest of the four triana kids that i nanny.

i've known them since the third alex, who's six, was a baby.

carmen will be three in may and she can fold her clothes better than some of her older siblings can. i even taught them how to fold... but she learned on her own.

she is a little obsessed with clothes you should know.

her reward for pooping in the potty is getting to wear her favorite pipple (purple) outfit. not candy, a sticker, or a treat, but clothes. haha i love her!

where has the time gone??!

i remember when she used to fit in this little baby towel of hers.

her new favorite thing is a 'pink bath'.

(just a little red food coloring makes for a happy day!)

we love to bake cookies while the big kiddos are at school.

i pull out the chocolate chips for the batter 'oooh i like those'

so i let her eat some batter with chips

'pina (carina) that make me happy! i do it again?'

haha cutest thing ever!

cousins avery and krew matching in their paul frank jammies.

baby hawk at big brother reef's birthday party. i could let him sleep on me all day!

and our newest addition in the schimpf family!!! baby brock, so fresh and new!